I am a part of a mastermind group called Flight Club and we get together 4 times a year to work hard and build our businesses. The people in the mastermind are like family to me now. I sponsored a networking event and also got to speak from the front of the room that night. I am doing this more and more, speaking that is.
I discovered A LOT of things at a mastermind this past week and I wanted to share them with you.
#1 – I don’t have to be in control of everything.
I just need to be aware and know when my help is needed.
I learned that if you have a village allow them to help. If you do not have a village GET ONE. It matters. I had over 15 opportunities this week to practice leaning into my village and letting them help us and have our backs. (Jack’s, mine & our dog Duch and my other business in Portland, OR). I also learned you don’t just hand it over, you let yourself listen to your instinct, intuition or whatever you call it. So there is a balance between leaning into the help (which historically has been hard for me) and knowing when to step in and support or guide the path.
I was able to stay present to the work we were doing on the trip, stay present in conversations I was having and when I needed support from friends there I asked for it.
This is HUGE growth for me and my family. I feel like GOD has been working on me to get I have a village and can lean in. I am listening.
#2 – I do have something to say so I am going to SAY IT!
NO MORE BEING HUSHED.
I have second guessed myself the majority of my life. Doubted my worth and was hushed so much as a child it carried over into my adulthood. I have been working now for years to ensure my fear, my stinkin’ thinkin’, has no power over me anymore. So I am NO LONGER questioning with 100% vigor that I have any reason to be HUSHED. In fact, just the reverse. I am feeling the PULL to speak louder and louder. So expect to hear more and more and more from me.
#3 – Feeling Shame or Guilt is OVERRATED.
Yup you read that right. I realized through talking to the people I was working with that shame and guilt were being held as something to achieve and I didn’t want any part of it. I have no interest in being a martyr, holding onto ANYTHING that doesn’t support my intentions or thinking for one minute that I would be doing anyone a favor, least of all me, by lugging around these INCREDIBLY heavy hitters.
#4 – Secrets Kill.
I have known for a long time how secrets kill your soul. I decided when I was in my late 20’s to stop keeping other people’s DEADLY secrets. I will keep someone’s confidence, but not ugly, deadly, soul-killing secrets. I was given an opportunity to share something from my life this week. Something I thought I wasn’t holding onto. I was still keeping it a secret. I believed still somewhere deep inside of me that if I told my truth no one would love me. So I decided to not let anyone else dictate in my head, my heart or my life what I say about my life. Another layer of being truly who I am in the world.
So my question for you this week is this:
How much are you trying to control in your life? Too little? Too much?
Do you ask for help? Do you let others help you when they offer? What would have to happen (short of being out of the country like me) for you to lean into help?
Is there any area of your life where you feel like you are hushing yourself? That your voice is not being heard?
Are you holding onto shame and or guilt? Are you using them in fear because you have NO idea what you would do if you let them go?
Are you holding onto secrets?
I will be talking more and more about these CORE issues in the weeks to come.
Let me know in the comments section the answers to any or all of those questions. I want to start the conversation and connect.
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